Psssst... Peggy

This past weekend Joe and I attended a Lenten Retreat with our church. It was restful to be out of town and to be at a quiet place where we could unload the stresses of our life for a while. We left Thursday afternoon and the drive was nice and leisurely and we had fun just relaxing - looking forward to a few days of peace and quiet.

The retreat is always held at Conception Abbey - a Benedictine monastery in Conception, Missouri. It's a beautiful place - in the middle of nowhere, or so it seems. It sits on a hill and is surrounded by fields full of cattle and wind turbines - certainly an incongruent addition to the fields. It's amazing how their slow circular movement induces a sense of calm and mystery to the place. When we arrived, the sky was a beautiful and clear blue, the temperature almost balmy - above 30 degrees - whoo hoo!

And then, like every year, the snow began to fall. It started Thursday evening and didn't end until Saturday morning and 6"- 8" later. It was absolutely beautiful and I was thankful I had nowhere to be except where I was.

The theme of the retreat was "Speak Lord for your servant is listening" - When I first read this on the board, I thought it said "Speak LOUD for your servant is listening" - It seemed more appropriate for our current circumstances. We studied 1 Samuel 3:1-10 - the story about Eli and Samuel and God's calling in the middle of the night...and Samuel's response. We talked about discernment - how do we recognize God's voice? We talked about fear and reluctance - the anxiety that comes from stepping outside our familiar and responding to God's call. We talked about the joy that comes from answering the call...And, most of all, we talked about how we have to be willing to place ourselves before God without expectation - about how God will do the work of reconciling our own wants and needs to help us and to equip us to discern what He wants for us and from us.

Somewhere along the way of the weekend, I recognized that God's calling is for each of us - every moment of every day. I know this is true and it was good to be reminded. We are called to be an instrument of His love and grace in each encounter we experience and wherever we are. There is joy to be found in that opportunity and I pray that I have the courage to pursue the task and to take the risk.

God knows each of us and calls us by name - sometimes with a quiet whisper, sometimes with a loud voice, sometimes through the voice of another person, sometimes in the middle of the night - And, always... always with love.

Just a few of the reasons...

Just a few of the reasons I love Joe...

... He has a heart for God
... He is my best friend
... He loves me as I am - faults and all
... He makes my heart smile - every time I see him!
... He is playful
... He laughs - a lot
... He likes to make me laugh
... He makes me laugh
... He fills my life with Joy
... He likes to Dance
... He is calm to my storm
... He loves his girls
... He is a good example
... He loves Hank
... He loves his Mom
... He loves his brothers and his sister
... He loves my Mom
... He loves my sisters and their families
... He is strong, physically and emotionally
... He is trustworthy
... He works hard
... He is level-headed
... He knows how to fix lots of things around the house and with the car
... He loves nature and finds beauty there
... He likes my cooking
... He is artistic and creative
... He is humble
... He has a beautiful smile
... He is patient
... He has a great laugh
... He is a stacker
... He likes to watch old movies
... He loves all kinds of music
... He watched Old Yeller and cried at the end
... He wanted to be a cowboy when he grew up
... He had a Red Ryder BB Gun
... He likes to help people
... He has a servant's heart
... He doesn't get embarrassed easily
... He is quiet and a little bit shy
... He is willing to try just about anything - except taste a "goober-burger"
... He has a great sense of humor
... He is faithful
... He loves to play his guitar
... He likes to hang out with me
... He's a good and patient shopper - even in the purse and shoe departments
... He keeps his promises
... He is dedicated and loyal
... He likes to learn new things
... He remembers everything
... He is compassionate
... He is romantic
... He is thoughtful
... He is kind
... He loves unconditionally
... He loves me!
... He shares my heart

Like I said...Just a few of the reasons I LOVE JOE!

May I have this dance?

For many years, Joe and I took ballroom dance lessons. In fact, we met taking classes and that will be a story for another day. When we first met, we took classes separately and with different teachers. Joe had started about a year or so before I met him; so, he was fairly confident of his skills and his abilities. I, on the other hand, was a novice and was fortunate enough, by circumstances, to be able to take lessons with a premier teacher that brought me along rather quickly.

Ballroom dance is not for the faint of heart. It is a sport that requires a person to be in relatively good health and it is hard work - mentally and physically. I soon learned the really "great" dancers make it look easy and effortless, graceful and smooth. And, I soon learned from Todd, my teacher, that the way to make it look easy and effortless, graceful and smooth is to learn the steps, to learn the technique, to practice, practice, practice and to let your partner lead - I had to learn to follow.

Let me tell you, following is not my strong point. As I have previously explained, I like to be in control of all aspects of my life. So, dance was no different and it was quite a challenge (especially because the woman normally has her back to the line of dance, has her partner dancing "into" her and she CANNOT see where she is going or why). I was constantly being reprimanded on my "back leading" skills - they were very, very good and, just keep in mind, it is impossible for both partners to lead and for the dance to be beautiful.

So, I slowly learned to dance - not just the patterns, but the art of expressing myself through movement with the music, the balance, the nuances of why it is important for my head to be at a certain angle, why my feet had to point a certain direction, why my arms and shoulders had to be placed in a specific pose and in a specific relationship to my body and to my partner's. I also learned that the closer the partners are able to move together, the easier it is to dance the more difficult steps, spins and turns. The "center" for both partners becomes one instead of two; so, those movements are easier to master.

Another thing I learned is that dancing is a matter of trust - trust in your partner that he will not drop you or spin you into oblivion, trust that your partner will dance to your skill level and help you put your feet in the proper position and at the proper time so you will be able to take the next step without falling.

Dance is such a beautiful metaphor for our relationship with God. All the things I've explained about learning to dance are valuable lessons regarding God's role in my life. He leads by taking my hand in His and, with the other, gently guiding me into the next step where I am meant to follow. It's really very simple and, at times, can be very difficult. I fully understand the concept. It's just that, sometimes, I have issues with the execution.

This all brings me to something I read this week that has touched me very deeply. I read this on Ann Voscamp's blog - Holy Experience...She is reviewing a book by Sally Clarkson called Dancing with My Father: How God Leads Us Into a Life of Grace and Joy.                

"To grow in this joy, I have to move where He leads. When dancers attempt to turn in different directions, there is no beauty, no synchronizing of movement. But when they learn to read each other's movements and move as one body, there is beauty, a grace, and a skill of step that grants the joy of unity and elegance to the dance."

I love this! It touches my soul. When Joe and I learn to dance together as one (and, it is a constant learning - in all areas of our life together), it is such an intimate experience. I feel my soul fly free and I am in tune with the rhythm of his heart and it feels so right.

So, too, when I learn to dance with God, it is an intimate and magical experience - one of trust, one of surrender, one of knowing that He will always lead me where I am supposed to go - as long as I allow Him to guide my steps. In that learning is where I find freedom, confidence, beauty, grace and joy! And, oh, how sweet the dance...!