I was weepy! Easter Sunday and I was overwhelmed with a monumental case of emotional upheaval. My heart was so full it cried most of the morning.
First of all, my mom joined us at church. She visits every now and then and, for some reason, it was so important for me that she be there with us this Easter. We are not a huggy, physical display of affection type of family. Sure, we touch each other - just not a lot. But, oh, how we love - deep and true. God is faithful and loves us abundantly and, as I was sitting there beside mom during the service, I realized one of the reasons I know that God is faithful and I know His love is abundant is because of how my mother loves me - unconditionally, deeply, faithfully, always - even when I am so undeserving. She is my example of Grace - mostly because of the way she loves - the way she has always loved - she knows no other way. My heart was overflowing with love for her. It literally took my breath away!
Another reason I was weepy is that celebrating Easter with our children is especially hard for me. Even though we love each other deeply and enjoy being together, our immediate family is not always united in the reason we celebrate. We were missing two of our daughters and their families at our celebration and I felt the void, deeply. In addition, none of our children have much of a connection with their faith and it hurts me that they miss the deeper meaning of Easter. Or, at least, that is my worry. We always enjoy being together and celebrating the beautiful newness of spring, the Easter eggs, the flowers and a great dinner with lots of laughter. However, I yearn for them to have a more fulfilling understanding of what this day is all about. I want them to grasp how powerful it is that God loves us enough to die for us and it is the only thing in this life that is truly worth knowing and understanding. I want them to experience the overwhelming love that He chose to pour out for us on the cross. I want them to have hearts that rejoice in the resurrection. And, to know that whatever they face in this life, He is there with them, singing over them and quieting them with His love when they feel alone or afraid. I want them to share our heart and love for God so they can feel His love for each of them. I know, these decisions belong to them and, if only they find Him, it will make all of the difference in how they love, forgive, live their lives and raise their families. My heart longs to celebrate these lasting things with them. And, I pray that I may be their example of Grace.
I was weepy because my heart is tender and full - full of love for my family, for those that are here with me; and, for those that have long been gone and I still think about each day; full of anticipation of victories to come, full of anticipation and hope for new beginnings, adventures and opportunities, full of wonder, and, especially, full of thanks - for God's love so lavishly and unselfishly offered.
Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. (NLT)